Ideas & Advice

COVID Is More Difficult When You’re Co-Parenting Through It

What-It’s-Like-To-Co-Parent-Through-COVID
Written by Publishing Team

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I caught the kids on Christmas Eve which just happens to be my birthday. We’re Jews, and it’s currently a global pandemic, so the kids and I hadn’t planned to visit my elderly aunt and uncle, who are both immunocompromised for different reasons.

The bagel brunch they made for the five of us was lovely; the past few years have made every interaction valuable, no matter how big or small. Between lox and tapenades, fruits and vegetables, they spared no expense.

After breakfast we returned home and had a low-key day of celebrations. We were saving our energy for the next day; our plans were to go to a friend’s house to celebrate a rather secular Christmas. We planned to gorge on food and movies, and enjoy each other’s company. It was going to be another very small and low-key day as the host had just overcome breast cancer and, as a result, was immunocompromised. We had seen each other throughout the pandemic because I had helped her with her son, and we had continued to help each other with emotional support.

But around 3 p.m. my ex-husband called me to tell me he had had a fever the day before. Fortunately, we had not been to our friends’ house yet.

I told my friends that we would stay home, despite our weeks of planning. It was not worth the risk.

On the 27th, my ex-husband confirmed that he had COVID. I then had to inform my aunt and uncle about our exposure, and therefore theirs. I was not feeling well. They took it in stride and we all started to quarantine.

It took three and a half days of quarantine before scheduling an in-car PCR test. Fortunately, I had purchased home tests from Amazon a few weeks ago, so I had a slight confirmation of our health. But for clarity, I had my daughter tested, who had no symptoms. My son had developed symptoms (a fatty cough and sniffling), so I chose to ask the doctor to give him a full panel; if he didn’t have COVID, I wanted to know exactly what it was and eliminate any doubts.

My daughter’s results came back negative on December 29 and my son’s came back negative for COVID but positive for rhinovirus the same day. To say that I was relieved is an understatement; a cold we could handle. We updated my aunt and uncle, who were still receiving negative COVID results themselves. We leaned until the ten days then recommended by the CDC were over to make sure COVID did not develop. And as the eleventh day rolled around, we went out for a barbecue at a local restaurant.

The next morning, at the start of day 12 (since my ex-husband was infected), my daughter started to have a sore throat, like my son a few days before. I was pretty sure she was developing the rhinovirus that my son had tested positive for, given our closeness to each other.

I decided to start quarantining them again for the remaining three days with me before sending them back to my ex-husband anyway. It would keep the kids healthier and prevent others from catching what we had.

The day before my kids returned to my ex-husband, I took them to a school-sanctioned COVID testing site. They were going to go back to school exactly one week later, and I figured I would make it easier for my ex by not forcing him to drag them there. He had finally become COVID-free again a few days before, but he was not 100 percent.

On the 14th day since my kids saw their dad – and six days since my daughter had her first PCR test – we received notification from the school district that she had been diagnosed with COVID. The kids were already going back to my ex when we found out, and we decided to keep them there. He was the only one who still contracted COVID, anyway. If there were other exposure issues, they were mitigated if there were any. In addition, at my place, they refuse not to sleep together. Thus, they had a better chance of being separated and safe in his home.

It was two days ago. Since then, my son’s school-sanctioned COVID test has also come back positive. This means (between home tests and PCR) that our family went without positive results for more than eleven days. Of course, it was my fault with untimely testing. But what I find true about COVID is that it’s no ordinary virus, and it can “sit dormant” for quite a while before hitting your family in the dark. towards.

So at this point there is no final tally for my family yet. COVID has been in our house for at least 16 days (not including the incubation period). Three of us got it; I am the only one to escape it so far. Fortunately, those who have had it are incredibly lucky to only experience mild symptoms.

Of course, having two houses has undoubtedly made it possible to have a little more space and to recover from COVID. My ex-husband and I are fortunate to be able to work from home and also have minimal work interruptions. Although that may change next week when the kids return to a virtual learning week. So ask us again then.

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